Sunday, April 7, 2013

Dear Buffy,

Lately I've been really worried that I'm a bad person, or filled with evil, or part demon. I kinda feel like Tara a little bit, when she was so worried about showing her evil true nature to her friends. She was so afraid of letting her darkness out and hurting people she loved. That's how I feel. Like I just need to stay away from anyone I care about because I don't want to hurt them with this bubbling darkness that I keep just below the surface. But obviously, Tara was not evil, so that's not applicable. I kinda feel like more like Anya when she backslided and relapsed into her demon ways. Like I want to be good, but I've just been through a lot of heartache and now I'm devolving into what is most comfortable for me: evil. Not that I think Anya was evil. I think she was kinda altruistic, enacting vengeance for people could be seen as standing up for victims. It's a gray area. Well, not to you, I suppose. You never fully warmed up to her, or Tara for that matter. I hope you don't, um, hate me.

Just hoping everything is gonna be okay,

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