Hi B!
This last week I've been feeling... (what if I just ended the letter there? ha.) feeling a lot like Willow season six dealing with her magic addiction. I feel like I just said, "I'm stronger than this. I can beat this." (About my foods problems, not literal magic.) Of course, Will was 21 when she went through that and I'm 27.... ugh.... I wouldn't be judging anyone else if they went through what I go through, and yet I'm so hard on myself. And, it's not like I crashed a car with my mind and broke the arm of anyone's kid sister. I am my own kid's sister. (That would be a great band name.) I feel like you just hid all of my magic stuff and took away all of my crystals and candles but Amy the ex-rat is still lurking about.
It's not my fricking birthday.
love, Babs
Saturday, November 29, 2014
Thursday, November 13, 2014
Dear Buffy,
Hey Buff,
So, I'm not doing so well, which you probably assumed because I'm writing to you. I'm having a really hard time with comedy and my food problems. I feel like Faith, alone, isolated, like I don't have anyone really close to me, mostly because I don't let them get close to me. I let my fear and sadness evolve into anger like she does and then I allow that anger to propel my fight (for her literal fighting and slaying, for me comedying). I wish I was like you, propelled by love to fight. I wish I felt like I was full of love and it burned brighter than the fire. But, in the end, I just feel like I'm all alone, like the episode where Willow came back and made herself invisible accidentally and got locked in a cave with a blood slurping demon. All alone, little lamb.
love, Babs
So, I'm not doing so well, which you probably assumed because I'm writing to you. I'm having a really hard time with comedy and my food problems. I feel like Faith, alone, isolated, like I don't have anyone really close to me, mostly because I don't let them get close to me. I let my fear and sadness evolve into anger like she does and then I allow that anger to propel my fight (for her literal fighting and slaying, for me comedying). I wish I was like you, propelled by love to fight. I wish I felt like I was full of love and it burned brighter than the fire. But, in the end, I just feel like I'm all alone, like the episode where Willow came back and made herself invisible accidentally and got locked in a cave with a blood slurping demon. All alone, little lamb.
love, Babs
Sunday, November 9, 2014
Dear Buffy,
Hey B,
As per usual, I'm going all wonky about life. All my food is coming to life and staring at me and telling me how I feel. Can food read minds? Did it get an aspect of a demon? And even if food is psychic, how did it get so pushy? I feel like the food problem might be coming back to life, like Willow slaughtered a deer over a gravestone and wiped blood on her t-zone. I'm not like seriously falling off the wagon, more like when Amy gave Willow a birthday present spell and she sorta fell off the wagon, but it didn't count because Amy dosed her, and she didn't work the magicks herself. That's how I feel. I ate a lot the last few days, but I didn't throw up so it's my birthday?
Lotsa questions. Fun.
love, Babs
As per usual, I'm going all wonky about life. All my food is coming to life and staring at me and telling me how I feel. Can food read minds? Did it get an aspect of a demon? And even if food is psychic, how did it get so pushy? I feel like the food problem might be coming back to life, like Willow slaughtered a deer over a gravestone and wiped blood on her t-zone. I'm not like seriously falling off the wagon, more like when Amy gave Willow a birthday present spell and she sorta fell off the wagon, but it didn't count because Amy dosed her, and she didn't work the magicks herself. That's how I feel. I ate a lot the last few days, but I didn't throw up so it's my birthday?
Lotsa questions. Fun.
love, Babs
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