Sunday, December 28, 2014

Dear Buffy,

Last night and the night before I had a dream that I was on a date with Spike. I think he had his soul at this point, but it was maybe in the post saving the world situation because he was cocky and stuff. On one of the dates it was Valentine's Day and it was a super fancy classy vampire bar (I know, weird, right?) full of witches and demons and I fit right in even though I was clearly very shy and inexperienced in the black arts, but also in social situations and dating. I'm not inexperienced in sex, just dating. (I mean, it's not like you were a pro at it when you guys hooked up...) At one point during the date Spike said, "Oh, don't look now, Pet, but your ex is here and he brought his trollop. I'm so sorry, love. Do you want to make out to make him jealous?" And then we had a steamy make out but there was no ex there whatsoever! So fricking cheeky!


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